Police Blotters – July 2010

More wackiness from a small town newspaper:

  • 7:23 p.m. — A caller reported a 3-1/2 foot iguana had gotten loose.
  • 10:26 a.m. — A caller reported a neighbor was blasting talk radio and had sounded an air horn at about 3 a.m.
  • 2:07 p.m. — A caller reported a man with a dead deer leg, sitting in front of a business since 10:30 a.m. The man was talking to himself, but not making any sense. He was admonished to move on.
  • 7:41 p.m. — A caller reported a “massive shopping spree” at the Salvation Army. No one was located.
  • 1:12 a.m. — A caller reported a man with stars tattooed where his eyebrows should be was causing a disturbance.
  • 6:59 p.m. — A caller reported finding a jacket with ID, medication, food stamps and a set of dentures.
  • 12:55 p.m. — A caller reported a dispute possibly becoming physical. A man just head-butted another man’s vehicle. The man said he didn’t like the way the vehicle looked, so he hit it with his head.
  • 1:20 a.m. — A woman reported she was being chased by a large pack of 20 to 25 wild dogs. She could not be located.
  • 6:07 a.m. — A man reported a woman he did not know was on his couch and might have come in through an open window. She was arrested on suspicion of trespassing.
  • 3:21 p.m. — A caller reported a flag and flag pole had been stolen sometime after the Fourth of July, and a 5′ by 6′ wooden moose had been stolen in January.
  • 6:55 p.m. — A woman reported a man wearing a black knit hat and pants came into her backyard and told her husband he had recently moved from Puerto Rico and needed directions to the golf course. The woman found this suspicious because the man had no accent and seemed to be dressed too warmly for the summer.
  • 10:07 a.m. — A caller from a business reported a man who said the next time someone walked out of a store, there would be bloodshed. He was advised not to return.
  • 5:41 p.m. — A caller reported a possible burglary in progress. A man attempting to sell meat in the neighborhood now had his vehicle backed into another residence’s driveway and when approached, began to rake. He could not be located.
  • 1:11 p.m. — A caller from a business reported a woman with a mask on near an ATM. She was admonished for wearing a sun veil.
  • 6:31 p.m. — A caller from a local park reported a man wearing an umpire shirt, an apron and orange knee socks was trying to light a barbecue and scaring parents and children. The man was found to have been living in the snack shack and was arrested on suspicion of burglary and receiving stolen property.
  • 9:52 p.m. — A caller from a business reported a giant man who looked like Santa Claus or Hulk Hogan had been asked to leave, but kept coming back inside. He was given a ride.
  • 9:47 p.m. — A caller reported cardboard cats in the road. No kitties were located.
  • 8:16 p.m. — A woman reported her mother had called and said she was in an underground meth lab and felt threatened. The woman was located and was OK.
  • 10 a.m. — A man requested a welfare check on his daughter. He said they live on a bus with no bathroom and the mother brings home roadkill to cook for meals. No one was home.
  • 9:31 p.m. — More than 20 calls were received from a phone with a local address. The owner of the phone was located and was break-dancing and “pocket-dialing.”
  • 7:30 p.m. — A woman reported a man was following her and saying, “Jennifer, I’m still in love with you.” The woman said her name isn’t Jennifer and she doesn’t know the man. He was advised to stay away.
  • 12:24 p.m. — A woman reported a box was thrown at her vehicle that had a bullet inside and a note that said “honk honk.”
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