Police Blotter – September 2008

• 2:20 a.m. – A caller reported a theft of a portable toilet. The caller said it was taken by a neighbor who is an ex-Hells Angels member. The portable toilet was gray and white with a chair and a bucket attached. The caller said he wasn’t sure if the portable toilet was stolen or just missing.
• 10:35 a.m. – A man reported losing his partial dental plate downtown that had one plastic tooth in it.
• 10:32 a.m. -A caller reported a business partner had hit him over the head and stole a gold nugget two days prior.
• 3:58 p.m. – A caller reported that an individual who works at a property next door was yelling at her because of the flies that were coming off her horse.
• 2:26 a.m. – A caller reported a loud party with three or four women urinating on a driveway.
• 8:37 a.m. – A caller reported a can of baked beans had been dumped on her car.
• 9:20 a.m. – A caller reported finding a dead woodpecker in his bathtub. He told officers he believed the bird was put there intentionally. Later, the caller reported that he found a hole in the wall that allowed the bird access to the bathtub.
• 11:07 p.m. – A caller reported the someone had urinated on his Jeep while he was at the Draft Horse Classic.  [Editor's Note: the Draft Horse Classic is a rather embarrassing lumberjack/cowboy get-together and frankly a place where I think one can reasonably expect that someone will urinate on their jeep.]
• 11:05 a.m. – A man reported a tenant was keeping a rattlesnake in a terrarium and violating the rental contract that prohibits pets. The man said he has started the eviction process but is concerned the tenant would release the snake in the property.
• 11:52 a.m. – A woman said a suspicious man came up to her and started stroking her hair.
• 5:59 p.m. – A woman reported a juvenile skateboarding on her roof. A similar call came in from another home. Responding officers found the skateboarder and arrested him.
• 9:18 a.m. – A caller came to the lobby at the Police Department and requested officer contact after she alleged her children, who were at the movies, were jumped by Lindsay Lohan and Andre the Giant. The reporting person alleged Lohan was running a prostitution ring in Hollywood.
• 3:09 p.m. – A caller reported that she was assaulted by a female. The caller was a process server who said she had an unknown object thrown at her face, and she denied the need for medical attention. The caller later reported the item was a muffin.

Let Me Take You Down

When we need a escape from the City, we often head north. We might go to the Marin Headlands or to Mt. Tam for a hike. Point Reyes has so many of our favorite things: hikes, beaches, farms. Up north, there are apples to pick and pork to eat. But a recent trip down Highway 1 reminded me of the many reasons to go south.

First, there are u-picks right off the road. I’m a little obsessed with u-picks these days. I love the chance to seeing how things grow, I love seeing what grows in different regions, and I love the bargain prices most u-picks offer.

We picked berries at one of  Swanton Berry Farm’s fields. As well as making a delicious olallieberry jam, Swanton was the first organic farm in the country to unionize their workers. Their workers receive health care, retirement benefits, and vacation and holiday pay — better than what many other (and likely more profitable) companies offer their workers.

Their olallieberry u-pick was already closed for the season but the strawberry patch, just north of Davenport, was open. It’s a serve yourself operation. You take a flat and some plastic baskets and then take a short walk to the u-pick field. When you’re done, you weigh your haul and pay, taking what change you need from the open till. (You can also pick up pies, strawberry shortcakes and their terrific jam there as well).

Despite the notice that this year was slim pickins for strawberries, we found plenty to pick. We were the only pickers out there on this Saturday afternoon. Maybe the gray weather kept people away or maybe most people associate strawberries with spring time.

We picked more than two people could reasonably handle, of course. There’s something about a u-pick. We always pick more than we should, whether it’s tomatoes, apples, or berries.

But our seven pounds of strawberries in the trunk of the car — enough to have strawberry shortcake for the next three weeks straight — didn’t stop us from hitting the brakes when we saw the sign that said “SLOW FOR PIE”.

This is yet another reason to spend more time on Highway 1 between San Francisco and Santa Cruz: it’s Pie Road. Swanton sells pies, Duarte’s in Pescadero is famous for their pies, and then there’s Pie Ranch, half way between the two.

Pie Ranch operates out of a barn on the side of the road. You’ll find local produce, dried beans, and you can even grind your own wheat. Or, of course, you can just buy a pie, as we did.

After all, strawberry shortcake makes for a delicious dessert, but pie and coffee is truly the breakfast of champions.

Do It for the Pigs

As you may have heard, there’s an election coming up this November. I know, I know, you already know all about it, and you’ve already decided how you’re going to vote on California’s Proposition 2.

Prop 2 is one positive step toward making life better for the animals we eat. It would make certain animal confinement cages illegal. If we pass this measure, it will be against California law to raise veal in crates so small the animals can’t move, keep laying hens in battery cages where they can’t even extend their wings, or keep delicious pigs in gestation crates that are only 2 feet wide.

Californians are forward thinking. We’re funding stem cell research like nobody’s business and we’re not afraid to limit greenhouse gases. So it’s a little embarrassing that Oregon, Florida and Arizona have already passed legislation like Prop 2. Even Senator Dianne Feinstein, California’s very own Republican in Democratic-clothing, is supporting it.

For more information, go to HumaneCalifornia.org

Rave: Herbed Cheese

This summer was brought to Mr. WholeHog and I by herbed cream cheese.

Nearly every week, Mr. WholeHog makes an herbed cream cheese. He’s not the type to rely on recipes, but each batch is heavy on the shallots and flecked with any herbs we happen to have on hand (this generally includes parsley, basil, thyme and chives).

We eat it weekly for lunch, slathered on thick slices of Tartine country bread and topped with garden tomatoes and thin slices of cucumber.

You’re Leaving There Too Soon

It was hard to leave San Francisco when the City had provided two (two!) full weeks of sunshine, but a second trip up to Tahoe was irresistible.

I can’t recall if I’ve ever stayed at the lake in September and I must say, the lake is especially dreamy post-Labor Day. It’s quiet. Most of the surrounding cabins were empty, and often, we were the only people in sight in the lake.

This trip, we stayed at a far more rustic cabin that was right on the beach and our lives for those few days revolved around the water: coffee, breakfast and the newspaper were taken outside, under the trees, looking out at the still lake.

The lake was cold, more in line with my childhood memories of swimming in Tahoe and certainly cooler than it felt in July, but we still swam a few times a day. (It shocks and appalls me to hear of people who don’t swim in Tahoe because it’s “too cold”. Tahoe, at any temperature, is the best swimming you’ll find.)

The nights were cooler than I’d anticipated as well, but that was all the more reason to eat dinner inside, open a bottle of red wine and watching the orange glow of sunset fall across the water.

And since its cold and there’s no one else around, why not duck into the neighboring cabins’ hot tub and look up at all the stars?

When I Wrote Graffiti My Name was Slop

Spotted on 22nd Avenue, on our way to pick up a Marquita Farms mystery box:

Note: with this entry, I’ve added a new category: pork!

Say you’ve stumbled on this here blog wanting to read only about pork (and who would blame you?), now you can simply click on the Pork category and you’ll see only pork-related posts. You’re welcome!

To Rock the Nation

This weekend brought Slow Food Nation to SF. Like many local eaters and devoted farmers market shoppers, I questioned if Slow Food Nation would really be worth my time and money. I already support the ideas behind Slow Food. Why shell out for Slow Food festivities when I already buy from the farmers themselves?

But greed got the better of me.

The first lure was that Primavera, our hands-down favorite Mexican food, would be at Slow-to-Go (the free component of SFN at Civic Center) on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Normally, we get only one chance to eat at Primavera on Saturday at the farmers market and we are religious about it. To eat Primavera more than once a week was a rare treat and a strong pull towards Civic Center.

Secondly, Slow-to-Go was all about pork. How could I pass up an event that clearly celebrated the king of meats?

Pork items eaten in our two visits to Slow-to-Go included:

• pork on biscuits
• pork with red-eye gravy
• pork sausage sandwich
• bacon huarache (a masa turnover — not a bacon-y sandal)
• tlacoyos with chorizo
  

And then, as we were leaving SFN on Sunday, I bought a muffaletta. I understood why Mr. WholeHog thought this was a little over the top. We’d already said we were done eating for the day before we split a Fatted Calf sausage sandwich.

But how could I resist? The muffaletta was from Salumi — a big reason behind my desire to pay Seattle a visit. Salumi was founded by Armandino Batali who, aside from being Mario’s dad and aside from having what may be one of the best first names ever, was trained by Dario Cecchini, the Tuscan master of meat.

On our visits to the Civic Center side of Slow Food Nation, we ate well, we ran into new and old food friends and it felt like we were part of something special and local.

Sadly our visit to the Taste Pavillion at Fort Mason was what I’d feared about SFN: a costly ticket, long lines, and limited tastes. But the bigger disappointment, for me, was the lack of education. Most stands seemed so overwhelmed just trying to serve the crowds that there was no time to say anything much about what they were serving. One big exception was coffee! The coffee people were excellent, enthusiastic and extremely well informed.

Police Blotters – August 2008

• 3:00 p.m. – A man reported finding several vegetables in his yard, possibly fired from a potato gun. The man said he filed a report because he was afraid his dogs could be injured by future flying produce.
• 5:21 p.m. — A man reported an unknown person rolling boulders onto his property during the day.
• 11:44 p.m. — A woman reported someone stole her clothes out of her dryer and was last seen running away with a blue hamper.
• 7:22 p.m. – A caller reported that unknown subjects were shooting lasers at him and that he was going to call the FBI. The caller was very upset that false information about him was being broadcast and that he, women and children were being hurt by the criminal activity.
• 7:24 p.m. – A caller reported a verbal fight involving a man and woman who were disagreeing with an umpire at a softball field. Responding officers found the umpire did not want to press charges and advised the man and woman to leave the park and not return. Thirty minutes later, the man fell and hit his head while walking down the street.
• 1:36 p.m. – A woman reported her neighbor using profanity at her. She said this has been happening for more than a year.
• 8:30 p.m. – A caller reported a stolen helmet was that three shades of blue with flames coming from the skull.
• 7:25 p.m. – A caller reported a neighbor was yelling, screaming and breaking things. Responding officers found a man who was cooking who said he became angry and was throwing pans.
• 5:45 p.m. – A caller from a business reported a woman in a wheelchair was “bathing” herself and acting suspiciously.
• 9:59 a.m. – A caller reported someone left a dead cat in a bar at the top of their driveway.
• 10:34 p.m. – A caller reported a fire. Responding firefighters found a man barbecuing.
• 2:19 a.m. – A caller reported someone stole his portable toilet. The caller said he suspected his neighbor.